It can be both concerning and challenging for families when a member is struggling with mental illness. Mental illnesses like borderline personality disorder affect families in complex ways. They can create chaos, break up familial relationships, and cause generations of family strife. However, this does not need to be the case. The key is to utilize professional intervention for the whole family as soon as any type of mental illness arises.
Better Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder
Borderline personality disorder is often a destructive condition when left untreated. Meanwhile, it affects more people than many people may realize. As stated in the online publication Borderline Personality Disorder by Doctors Chapman, Jamil, and Fleisher, “Surveys have estimated the prevalence of borderline personality disorder to be 1.6% in the general population and 20% of the psychiatric inpatient population.”
Many people also get borderline personality disorder confused with other personality disorders like multiple personality disorder. Yet, it is important not to confuse the two, as every type of personality disorder has significantly different signs and symptoms.
So then, what exactly is borderline personality disorder? According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), “Borderline personality disorder is a mental illness that severely impacts a person’s ability to manage their emotions. This loss of emotional control can increase impulsivity, affect how a person feels about themselves, and negatively impact their relationships with others.” Also, these are just a few of the signs and symptoms of the disorder.
The Signs and Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder
Many signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder can help families determine whether or not a member is struggling. The following are just a few of those signs and symptoms:
- Trying to avoid the feeling of abandonment by jumping into relationships or quickly abandoning them
- Creating unstable relationships with family and friends
- Having a poor self-esteem
- Acting impulsively and dangerously without thinking of the consequences
- Self-harming or expressing suicidal ideations
- Exhibiting highly volatile mood swings
- Having trouble controlling anger
- Feeling dissociated from oneself, loved ones, and the outside world
If any, many, or all of these symptoms are present, it is highly recommended that professional help be sought as soon as possible. This help is not just for the individual struggling, but also for the entire family.
Understanding Mental Illness as a “Family Disease”
Just as mental illness is a chronic disease, like diabetes or cancer, mental illness is also a family disease. This is because it does not just affect the individual struggling; rather it affects everyone in the individual’s orbit.
Many people don’t realize just how affected they are by a loved one’s mental illness until they start to seek help. Helping a loved one with mental illness can bring about excessive levels of stress, anxiety, depression, and trauma. So, how much does borderline personality disorder affect families? The answer is often, “a lot.” Also, how does borderline personality disorder affect families? The answer is often, “in many different ways.”
How Does Borderline Personality Disorder Affect Families?
Borderline personality disorder family dynamics can be complicated, to say the least. Dealing with a family member with borderline personality disorder can cause unhealthy family dynamics. One of the reasons for this is that many people in a family can feel overlooked or unseen when a loved one is receiving extra attention for mental illness. This is very common for the children in the family.
Also, many people fall into a dangerous dynamic of “codependency” when it comes to helping a loved one with borderline personality disorder. This is when a family member’s entire identity becomes linked to helping out their loved one with mental illness. This is unhealthy because it leaves no room for personal growth. The good news is that there are many ways for the entire family to recover.
How to Support a Family Member With BPD
Supporting a BPD family member requires patience, empathy, and a commitment to learning about the disorder. Educating yourself about BPD can help you better understand their behaviors and emotional challenges, allowing you to respond with compassion rather than frustration. Additionally, setting healthy boundaries and encouraging professional treatment are crucial steps in fostering a supportive environment. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey—seeking support for yourself is just as important as supporting your loved one.
How Can the Whole Family Recover?
One of the best ways for the entire family to recover is the same as one of the best ways for the individual to recover from borderline personality disorder: therapy. Also, many types of therapy can be utilized by the family.
Yes, family members can benefit from family therapy (both with and without the individual struggling with borderline personality disorder present). However, the family can also benefit from participating in individual and group therapy. Many families also find that connecting to a recovery community with a focus on family healing from mental illness is also very helpful.
Helping the Family Heal at The Phoenix Recovery Center
Here at The Phoenix Recovery Center, we believe that the entire family must heal from issues of addiction and mental illness. This includes when borderline personality disorder affects families.
Recovery is about the journey, never the destination. That journey is easier when supported by those we love, and that journey can start right here at The Phoenix Recovery Center.
Borderline personality disorder does not just affect the individual struggling, it can also have many negative effects on the family. It can also be a trying time for a family as they try to get a loved one help for their borderline personality disorder. Also, the entire family needs to get help if there has been disruption due to mental illness. If you feel like you or a loved one is struggling with issues of mental illness, addiction, or co-occurring disorders, we can help get you on the positive path to long-term recovery right away. For more information about how mental illness affects the whole family, please reach out to The Phoenix Recovery Center today at (801) 438-3185.
